Holiday Shopping Survival Guide

Thanksgiving is over and the holiday season has officially begun. Have you got all your shopping done? Frankly, I haven’t even started but that’s what Amazon prime is for. But for some of you who are brave enough to venture outside this holiday season, we have provided some techniques to help you survive this holiday shopping season…throat punches optional.

Technique #1: Lunging Punch Defense (Tight Cover)

Always keep your hands up. People get a little heated during the holiday season. So say you get the last CusineArt and the person takes a swing at you. Use the tight cover to block them lunging at you. Then move to the T position that way you can take that sweet new CurineArt home.

Technique #2: Improvised Weapons (Downward Figure 8, Upward Figure 8 & X)

There are weapons everywhere. Whether it is a car antenna or a shopping bag. But these are useless unless you know how to use them. So remember your basic stroking patterns, such as downward figure 8, upward figure 8 and X. Now your ready for when an argument over a parking space turns into an all-out war!

Technique #3: Range Managment (Footjab)

The number one defense always don’t be there. Range management is key especially while dealing with crowds of tons of people. A foot jab is a great tool for keeping people on the outside as well as lining people up so you only have to defend yourself against one person at a time. Just remember to put some stank on it!

Technique #4: Headlock Escapes (attacker pulling you to the ground)

The headlock. One of the most common attacks by people who don’t know how to fight. Whether it’s children or adult you see the headlock everywhere. So you should probably know how to get out of one. Standing, on the ground, with stikes or without. It is one of the most important positions to know how to get out of. So next you’re waiting in line to see Santa at the mall remember to use control, not just pain compliance.

Technique #5: Trapping (to the Throat Punch of course!)

Training for years. Tons of drills. Thousands of reps. And finally, a situation where trapping is practical. I’m so excited! When there are tons of crowds and not a lot of space sometimes you can’t foot jab or wrestle someone to the ground. Use trapping instead. I mean you would bring a bo staff to that situation, would you? Trapping is great but one key point. In the absence of obstruction…hit with a throat punch!

Be safe this holiday shopping season and I’ll see all you secret Santas in store or on the internet. Watch out for Russian hackers…

Posted in Episodes.

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